It's Okay to Make A Change!
Recently, I've been going through a lot of changes. Part of that was due to health issues I had from lots of stress. But I learned a lot from the experience, and I feel I'll be doing much better this year.
I think part of my breakdown came from struggling to be true to myself, as an athlete, artist, writer, and musician. I was hearing messages from people in the media, and from people around me, that creative art doesn't matter and that you should just focus on finding a way to survive and make money. Although I was already growing tired of studying Business Administration, I was too scared to switch it. I was afraid I might regret moving towards my truer interests, such as health and well-being, research, and creativity.
I tried to make my college major fit me. I focused on business ethics and on how we could use business as a positive force for change, but I began to experience some challenges in studying it all the time. It wasn't overly negative, and most of the professors were very good - they had a lot of experience, and most of them encouraged the class, so I respected their work - but it was clear I was coming from a different perspective than theirs. I struggled with the conflict between studying business and how I truly felt about corruption, especially since being corrupt can often be seen as a viable strategy in the business world. I was really starting to question whether getting a business degree was what I really wanted.
Hearing about corrupt corporation after corrupt corporation getting in trouble with the law didn't help matters. I know good businesses exist, but they're often the locally owned, smaller ones with a real sense of community and commitment to ethics. Many of the bigger corporations have a totally different culture, one that I found increasingly difficult to support in any way.
Finally, I made the switch to Health Science, which I'd been eyeing for a while, but which I tried to convince myself I shouldn't study. Once I made the switch, I felt a deep sense of relief. Even though I didn't know for sure if I should do it, I knew it was really more aligned with what I'm actually interested in and what I truly want to support. I have a deeper interest in solving health problems and finding meaningful solutions to the issues we have in our world. That's much more valuable to me than just trying to make a corporation richer. (I still believe there can be value in good businesses, such as the ones that follow ethical guidelines, but I also feel open to exploring other ways to organize economies and societies beyond traditional business.)
Although I'm a tennis player, I'm also an artist who creates artwork in a variety of mediums, from music to drawing to writing. And as an artist, I've often battled against the idea that my work has to be commercially successful for it to be meaningful. I feel a lot of artists get exploited in the entertainment industry, which is why I've tried to avoid it. At the end of the day, I have to be true to myself and my art, and that's part of why I'm here.
What I learned from this, although it doesn't directly relate to tennis, is that it is okay to make a change in life. You don't have to just stick with one thing, especially if it no longer really fulfills you anymore. I can be incredibly stubborn, which is both a good and a bad thing sometimes, so for a long time, I resisted changing my major. Fortunately, I finally figured out what I truly want to do, and I'm so happy I made the change.
In tennis, players have to make changes throughout their lives, especially as they face new opponents, change their strategies, and adapt to aging. I've found that the tennis players who accept that change is an inevitable part of the sport go farther than the ones who feel they can play the exact same way as they did when they were young. With age comes changes in your strength and fitness, but you also have more wisdom, patience, and maturity than a younger player. The attributes of age can become strengths instead of weaknesses if you can accept the change.
In the same way, learning to accept change in your life helps you to realize when you need to move on from something. You can't always hold onto the past forever, or you never see when it's time to change. It's good to be able to let go of what's holding you back, and find your true purpose in life. Your calling is something you shouldn't reject, especially when you know that's where you should be.
The time I spent healing from the breakdown led me to get back to my artistic work again. I was still doing it while I was studying business, but I've gone farther ever since I let the degree go. Now I know I want to make new art, centered on the concepts of destiny and the idea that our lives have a purpose. I refuse to believe we're just meaningless beings that exist in the universe for no reason. I know there's a deeper purpose for why we're here.
Anyway, those were my thoughts on how it's okay to make a change, and how it can be a great thing to do in your life. The world awaits the new you! Don't be afraid to make a change when you know the time is right.